Exhibition Period: 04.02.2023- 25.03.2023

Opening Hours:
Tuesday-Sunday   13:00-18:00


Location:
Jung Hyun Gallery
ul. Piłsudskiego 74, 312C, Wrocław, Poland

(Eng.)


In May 2022, I started to do a drawing diary.


In the beginning was to record the feelings that are scattered and vaporised while making panels, stretching papers, and glueing the surface to prepare the work. This is my endeavour to quickly and fully unravel and archive the sensations and emotions I feel daily.

Before it all evaporates.

Every time a drama of all kinds of colours and shapes unfolds in my mind, my body has limitations to convert this into a 'full-scale' painting each time. Since you can immediately record the colour and shape of emotions and feelings with just paper and coloured pencils, this project has helped me a lot in resolving my anxiety about the fleeting sensations, emotions and memories that passed through my mind. As I continued to draw this diary, I became able to easily visualise and extract my heart and thoughts. During the process, I could also affirm my 35-year-old abyss. It feels like things that are not organised in my heart and head are finding their place one after another. It is like all the good, lovely, slanderous, mediocre, heavy, and bad feelings that were entangled in the depths of my heart can be confirmed and hopefully be completely mine again.

Beyond the context of recording emotions and memories, which is the goal of the drawing itself, this project is also a small fight to introduce and take care of my identity as a Korean woman living in Europe and the ordinariness and depth of the lives of all strangers around us. Last January, I held an exhibition in Berlin about 'Obersee', a lakeside I live, and the senses and memories that the place aroused in me through 'The sculptural painting', utilising the spatial characteristics of 'Villa Heike', a historic landmark in East Berlin. It was an exhibition considered to be the mother of or co-existing with this ‘@project.dear.diary' project.

At the beginning of the month-long exhibition, I saw some familiar neighbours. Still, as the exhibition moved on to the second half, more and more neighbours came to visit. I've lived in many cities, but during my 4 years of staying here, I already knew that Berlin is neither international nor friendly compared to other cities. Since I lived on the outskirts, mostly with Germans, rather than downtown, the way people in that neighbourhood treated me was always very hysterical or cold for no reason. Through the corona pandemic, this discomfort has become worse. Curiously, these unexpected visits revealed a new aspect of my work. After this exhibition, I was accepted into the neighbourhood for the first time. Was this due to a great sense of satisfaction and pride when they came to the show or was it due to a shared landscape we sensed and remembered? Rather than being an easy-going outlander who has to be attacked or avoided when I meet them on the street, I have become a resident of the neighbourhood who can be greeted, asked how I am, or invited into their homes.

After this series of experiences, I had a sense of mission. For reference, I have never felt or tried to have such a big and great feeling like this 'sense of mission' before. As people and capital gather in the desolate Berlin, the outskirts are also in the midst of change. Compared to just four years ago, the only people who looked like strangers were me, a Korean, and my British husband. Still, now there are so many that I often run into them on the street. I considered that recording and introducing my experienced senses and memories and promoting the change might not be only for the sake of myself and my family. I am grateful for being able to confirm and reassure the obvious fact that each of us, who can be recklessly othered and objectified, is multi-dimensional with a depth of life.

I have left Obersee. A month ago, I moved to Mitte. My family and I are having a moment of care, repair and healing, but my studio remains in the neighbourhood. I am continuing my little war on the front lines. Thankfully, some people in the neighbourhood still visit me when I open my studio or hold an exhibition and enjoy these drawing works.




Cho Juheon

2.1.2022

Berlin

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(한국어)




2022년 5월부터 나는 그림일기를 그리기 시작했다.

드로잉의 시작은 매일 느끼는 이 감각과 감정들을 온전히 작업으로 풀어내려는 노력 중, 정작 이걸 준비하는 과정에 판넬을 짜면서, 종이를 바르면서, 아교칠을 하면서 흩어져버리고 기체화 되어버리는 느낌들을 좀 빨리 기록해 놓기 위해서였다. 내 마음엔 매번 온갖 색과 모양의 드라마가 펼쳐지는데 내 몸은 이걸 다 커다란 ‘본격적인’ 작업으로 풀어내기엔 역부족이다. 종이와 색연필만 있으면 바로바로 감정과 느낌들의 색과 모양을 기록해 놓을 수 있기 때문에 이 프로젝트는 내 마음을 스쳐지나간 그 찰나의 느낌, 감정과 기억들이 사라져버리는 것에 대한 불안감을 해결하는데에 크게 도움을 줬다. 게다가 내 마음을 눈으로 매 번 확인하다보니 정확한 이유를 알 순 없지만 가슴이랑 머리속에 정리 안된 것들이 차곡차곡 제 자리를 찾는 느낌이었다. 마음 저 깊숙이 치적치적 꼬여있던 모든 좋고 중상이고 중간이고 중하이고 나쁜 느낌들이 내 눈으로 확인 되고 다시 온전히 내 것이 되는 기분이라고 설명하면 맞을까?


드로잉 작품 자체의 목표인 감정과 기억을 기록한다는 맥락을 넘어 이 프로젝트는 유럽에 살고있는 한국 여자라는 나의 정체성과  우리 주변 모든 이방인들의 삶의 평범함과 깊이를 소개하고 보살피기위한 작은 싸움이기도 하다. 지난 1월에 나는 베를린에서 내가 살고있는 곳인 Obersee와 그 장소가 나에게 일으킨 감각과 기억들을 ‘입체적 회화'로 동베를린의 역사적인 명소 ‘Villa Heike’ 의 장소적인 특성을 활용해 실현시키는 전시를 했다 - 이 ‘@project.dear.diary’ 프로젝트와 맥을 함께하거나 혹은 모체로 여겨지는 전시였다.


이 한달동안 이어졌던 전시의 초반에는 몇몇 낯이 익은 이웃들도 보였는데 전시가 중 후반으로 넘어가면서 거의 모든 동네사람들이 찾아왔다. 나는 여러 도시에서 살았었지만 다른 도시들에 비교하면 베를린이라는 곳이 그닥 인터네셔널 하지도 친절하지도 않은 곳이라는걸 이 곳에서 4년동안 살면서 이미 알고있었다. 게다가 나는 다운타운이 아니라 거의 독일인들만 거주하는 외곽에 살았었기 때문에 그 동네 사람들이 나를 대하는 방식은 늘 이유 없이 굉장히 날카롭거나 차가웠다. 코로나 팬데믹 시기를 거치면서 이 불편함은 더 심해지기도 했다. 희한하게도 이 예기치 않은 방문들은 내 작업의 새로운 면모가 드러나게했다. 전시에 찾아와 자신이 사는 곳을 소재로 한 작업들을 보며 대단한 만족감과 자부심을 느꼈는지 아니면 내가 감각하고 기억한 Obersee 풍경이 본인들이 느꼈던 그것과 비슷함에 통함을 느꼈는지 나는 이 전시 이후로 비로소 동네에 받아들여졌다. 나는 그렇게 느꼈다. 길에서 마주치면 인상을 쓰며 피하거나 해코지를 해야하는 이방인이라기 보다 인사를 하고 안부를 묻거나 자신의 집에 초대를 할 수 있는 동네 주민이 된 것이다.


이런 일련의 경험 이후로 나는 일종의 사명감을 가지게 되었다. 참고로 이 ‘사명감’과 같은 크고 위대한 감정은 일전에 느껴본적도 가져보려 한적도 없지만 말이다. 황량했던 베를린에 사람과 자본이 모이면서 외곽인 이곳도 변화가 한창이다. 불과 4년전과 비교하더라도 이전에는 이방인처럼 보이는 사람은 한국인인 나와 영국인인 남편 밖에 없없는데 이젠 종종 길에서 마주칠만큼 많아졌다. 이런 상황 속에서 나의 감정과 기억들을 기록하고 소개해 이 곳의 변화를 도모한다는 것이 오직 나와 나의 가족의 안위를 위하는 것 만은 아닐 수 있다는 생각을 했다. 무작정 타자화 되고 대상화 될 수 있는 우리 한명 한명에 입체감과 깊이가 있다는 당연한 사실을 확인시키고 안심시켜줄 수 있다는 것에 감사하게 생각한다.


나는 얼마 전 Obersee를 떠났다. 한달 전 부터 나는 Mitte에 이사와서 살면서 나와 나의 가족을 보살피고 치유하고 있지만 내 작업실은 아직 그 동네에 남아있다. 최전방에서 나의 작은 전쟁을 계속하는 중이다. 고맙게 아직도 몇몇 동네사람들은 내가 작업실을 개방하거나 전시를 할 때 찾아와주고 이 드로잉 작업들을 굉장히 재밌게 봐주었다.




조주현

2.1.2022

베를린에서

You are not the only devil.

If we can trust each other, everything would be soft and nice.

I bought a pair of pink shoes and I like it.

The expectations towards Berlin summer.

A seed of potential

Sometimes I can be cold and vicious.

Warren, heaven might taste like peach.

It has been such a long time since I have been on top of a mountain.
The world was so simple up there.
The sky and the earth. Even though it was so simple, I felt many good things.

Wind.

Wind.

Wind.

When the desire become real.

We are now warriors.
Because we finally got our own home after going through all kinds of bureaucratic events
that were offered by germans.

Rainy summer

Worshipping Oden by going to IKEA. Köttbuller!!

How is Warren so infinitely transparent?
How are you so kind?

We stretch out against each other.
Every good and bad thing is in the middle of us.
We always stretch out against each other.
Why.

I like Hokey pokey and cherry berry.

I met Günther and Barbra at Erfurt.
They invited me to their house.
They have been living there since 70‘s.

I found some german jokes are not fun. Because it hurts, but they laugh.

Greed, Anger, Ignorance.

Sometimes it hurts.

I think happiness would be transparent.
Transparent and it would have a lot of fragile roots spread all around it.

Jörg’s home has full of stories.
Jörg was a person who has so many stories.
All the objects and souvenirs he has are evidence of it.

Fear is not to overcome, it’s to endure.

If the feelings you felt reach me too,
I don’t think the world would be scary to me anymore.

Joyful conversation with curator Sang-hee.

You, my love.

When I was a child, the world was simply joyful.

Winter, please don’t come.

Winter is coming. No…

Please summer don’t go.

Berlin summer.

There is no such thing as a small life or a big life.
That’s what I thought during the documenta fifteen .

I am a complicated person.
Sometimes hope to be simple.

Jörg

It was a hot summer day.
A glass of Gin tonic with cucumber was a right solution to it.

Haya and the girl can’t get along.

Can’t we just have our peaceful life?
Two years ago we planned to build a flat and we are so glad that we cancelled that one.
Because we are learning again that things get never done on time in Berlin with this one.

My friend Haya said London was 39 degree.

Friends, we were teenagers and now you became a mother of a child.

Warren, hug me.

We have hibiscus in our garden.

Warren’s enchilada was made with love and it was spicy.

Gunther died today.

I had a very weird dream and it’s a secret.

Is this what marriage is like?
Keep going over the hurdles of life together.
Going through these ups and downs together.